回首那把长发

时不时我会翻看过往的照片。
我那把再努力留就到腰间的长发让我一阵惆怅。

我是绝对不会一把剪掉长发的人。
每次看见朋友把长发剪掉，我都非常敬佩那份勇气。

如今，我别无选择，长发从根落下。
化疗的我们，常常哀悼长发的失去，而且内心里也失去了自信。
癌症夺走了自尊和自信。你们不知道，我们多么讨厌这样的自己。

可没有一个人曾这样对我说。
Forum上的一位男性病患，却为我们（女孩子）写了这一些：

To all you (bald) women...

I've read lots here lately from the women about their feelings about losing their hair and how that makes them feel and, well, you know me, I just can't let this one go.

I know our society has made us feel that losing our hair from chemo makes us look sick.
I know that psychologically, it's a huge blow for a woman to lose her hair.
I know that you'd rather complain about a bad hair day than try to pick out the scarf that goes with the outfit.
I know all that.

But I also know this: When I see your pictures, with the short whispy hair, with the bald head, with the crew cut, with the strange new curls, what I see FIRST, before the bald head, before all the other stuff a guy is supposed to see first (hey, it's in our jeans. I mean, genes.)... what I really see first, is your eyes and your smiles. I see a beatiful person living life like they sing about in country songs. I see fighters. I see winners. I see women who I'd love to know. I see women who make me want to be a better person.

Oh, yeah, then I notice that you're bald, or fuzzy, or whispy, or wearing a scarf or hat. And, despite that, you're smiling a REAL smile that goes all the way to your eyes. And THAT is beautiful. If you think guys are staring at you, you're probably right, but not for the reason you're thinking. I have no reason to butter you up or try to lie to make you feel better. I just really wanted to you to hear (read) what I'm sure lots of guys feel, but don't really know how to say.

In case you missed it in my rambling, you're beautiful, with or without the hair.

谢谢你。